“How can you find a goal in life and form a plan of action?” First – what is a goal? It does not necessarily mean a great mission; it may mean no more than doing well, or doing better, the work you are doing now. A miner, earning good wages, may believe that he has no aim in life; for getting coal is merely work, whereas an aim, he thinks, is a vast ambition: such as to own a mine or run for Congress. He may be right or wrong, but it is practical wisdom to have an immediate purpose as well as a distant one; and in the miner’s case the obtaining of a sound education should be the primary object of life. Aims do not have to be dizzy ambitions. The value of a goal is not in its height so much as in its intensity. It can be devastating to aim too high and fail. However, when one purpose has been achieved it is easy to form another. A small success brings experience and offers the ability to adapt your decisions to your abilities. To know your limitations and possibilities is half-way to success. There are thousands whose general future is settled, but who have no particular interest beyond their daily round and common tasks. Some of them look at their work as a necessary labor, but also as a nuisance; and they live their real life at home among books, or hobbies, or gardening. Such people often live long, happy and useful lives, but it cannot always be said that they have made the best of their possibilities. If the business fails or hard times come, they frequently pass through the deep waters of suffering, experiences which a true mental attitude towards work would either have spared them altogether, or have enabled them to endure with greater stoicism.
When Purpose Is “Discovered”
Sometimes our life purpose only becomes clear to us after we’ve tried a number of different things. We can be restless and then strike something that suits us. We’re good at it and we enjoy it.
Self-Realization
If you are not sure yet what your goal is, don’t feel hopeless. If you know what you want, Pelmanism will promote every interest you have at heart. If you do not know what you want, you at least know that the needed knowledge will come, and that, for the present, you can go forward full of expectancy. Forget the pessimism which tempts you to believe that the world is against you. Don’t be cycnical. Take yourself in hand and resolve that in spite of every difficulty you will arrive, not in the limelight of public opinion, but in the sense of self-realization.
Failure and Half-Success
Many people, towards the end, are obliged to say: “I have wasted my time on unessentials.” “I have missed the substance and gained the shadow.” “I have allowed inferior men to leave me behind.” “I have not come up to the expectations of my friends and have rejoiced my enemies.” “I have sought the easy line in all things.” “I have not quite failed but my success has been insignificant.” It is not too late to arrange a plan of life which will make such confessions impossible in your case. But begin the arranging now. Don’t lose a moment.
Causes of Aimless Lives
(a) An absence of training in early initiative. (b) A shy and reserved temperament, predisposing to inaction. (c) The after effects of nervous illnesses. (d) A native changeability of disposition, no power of concentrated effort. (e) Weakness of will, causing disinclination to effort. (f) Pessimism; sometimes arising out of a deep study of one aspect of life, which has culminated in too many negatives. (g) Fatalism; which regards the individual as the helpless victim of circumstances, as a point upon which forces converge; whereas he is himself a force capable of resisting, restraining, compelling.
Decision vs. Indecision
35. Most of us have to earn a living and sometime this means we get round pegs in square holes. But these people usually have one great advantage mentally: they know what they want. The other people don’t; they are undecided. Now the round pegs can very often get out of the square holes if they play their part with caution and skill. In their leisure time they can prepare themselves for new work and new positions, and, when ready, can migrate and better themselves. This question of what a person shall do is personal; outsiders can advise on technical points but without a true science of life, or rather in the present undeveloped condition of vocational psychology, each individual must make up his or her mind and act on that initiative. This is a good thing.
Testing an Aim
You can gauge the quality of an aim by asking the following questions: 1. Is its achievement desirable? 2. Is it possible or impossible? 3. Is it possible or impossible to me? 4. What are the obstacles? 5. Can they be surmounted? 6. Will victory be too costly? 7. Can I find any happiness in it if I fail?
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